What do we know about Jeremiah, the prophet? There’s enough biographical information in the Book of Jeremiah that scholars have narrowed down his prophet-hood to the period from 627 BCE to 586 BCE. Much of the book is written not as a record of his public prophecies, but as his musings and dictations to his personal scribe, Baruch. The period of time covered is when Babylon was busy invading Egypt, Assyria, and Israel (Judah), and leads up to the destruction of the First Temple in Jerusalem, and the Babylonian exile of the Jews from their lands. Much of what Jeremiah has to say is about the Jews having turned away from God and faith practices, bringing about this period of turmoil, and leading to their exile. But, he apparently will opine, get right with God, get right with life, and, well, Joy to the World, Israel will rise and life will be good. The Book of Jeremiah led to three spin-off books – The Book of Baruch (his scribe), Lamentations (the only one still included in the Tanakh), and Letter of Jeremiah. I see I’ve got some reading ahead of me.
- A quick biography of who Jeremiah is, summarized in my intro above. Then launches into his first time hearing God’s words, that I’d summarize as “hey, Jeremiah, open your eyes, look around you, see the world as it is, and what needs to be fixed. You’re my guy, it’s going to be hard, but I’ll be with you every step of the way. Keep the faith!”
- Apparently God needed someone to whine to, as he compares his relationship with Israel to that of husband and wife. He laments that he gave everything he has to the Jews, supported them through all the tough times (without acknowledging he created those tough times). And the Jews response? Failing to obey him, chasing after other gods, generally just behaving like a loose woman. One can just imagine Jeremiah nodding and saying “uh huh, yes, sure, right…” and hoping that God will just have another drink and pass out on the table.
- Well then. God is definitely peeved at Israel and Judah, the two halves of what will later become just Israel. They are, to his sensibilities, whores, who have gone out there, opening their legs to whichever foreign stranger or other god wants to bed them. Yet, he wants them back. But, can he ever trust them again? If he takes them back, will they be faithful to him once more, or will they pine for other gods? Barkeep! Cut him off! He’s had enough!
- Having cried himself out, God turns to a dark place. Imagining that his people, the Jews, return to him, fully embracing faith, how will he react? Well, with the reversal of the big bang, taking a flourishing planet and turning it to a wasteland. Kind of like a Thanos finger-snap, but for everyone, not just half.
- We all remember the story of Sodom and Gomorrah, and how Abraham prevailed on God to spare the cities if a certain number of good folk could be found in them. And we know how that turned out. God remembers that fiasco, and tells Jeremiah that it ain’t happening again. He’s already looked ahead and decided that there just aren’t enough good people left to make up for the bad eggs and the general trend of humanity. Better to destroy it all and then… who knows? He challenges Jeremiah to prove him wrong, but has clearly made up his mind already.
- We’ve moved more directly into the history in the making arena, as Jeremiah predicts the coming destruction of Jerusalem. A siege has already begun, and he prophecies that doom is coming from the north. Wealth will not save the citizens of the city.
- God says, “You can’t go and break all my commandments and then just show up and say whoopsie, sorry about that, but all’s good now. And you can’t go off worshipping other gods. You’re hurting yourselves, not me. But… why does nobody love me best?” God really can be a bit of a whiny teenage dungeon master sort.
- God continues his diatribe. False prophets, false healers, false philanthropists, pretty much false everything purported to be good. After all, the people are doing these good acts, but they’re doing them in the name of false, i.e., other, gods. Jeremiah, under his breath, “look folks, sorry about all this, but please, remember, I’m just the messenger. I have to tell you what he tells me.”
- “Nobody listens to me! Nobody follows my rules! My campaign is fun for the players but all they do is keep referring to the rules written by Baal! I’m a better DM than he is! Stop listening to Baal!” I swear, once again, God is a Dungeon Master for an AD&D campaign.
- The laws of God are the ones to follow because he says so. The laws of other gods and the laws of man are delusional because he says so.
- God tells Jeremiah to get off his duff and get out there and tell the Jews the same stuff he’s been saying since the exodus from Egypt. “Follow me, follow my rules. If you keep following other gods and their rules, I’m coming for you. You’ve been warned.”
- Just so, like, you know, God isn’t laying all the blame on the Jews for straying from his path, he vows that all those pesky neighbors, i.e., other countries, that have been bad influences, will be sent packing, and if they don’t leave willingly, he’ll destroy them.
- Metaphorical storytime! God tells Jeremiah to put on a linen loincloth and wear it for awhile. Then he tells him to go bury it in the hills for awhile longer. Then he tells him to go dig it up and put it on. Jeremiah notes that the loincloth is rotted and unusable. God says, basically, “see, that’s what happens when you bury something important away and don’t use it properly, just like the Jews are doing with my laws!”
- God says he’s going to dry up all the wells to teach the wayward Jews a lesson. He’s not even going to listen when they repent, when they offer up sacrifices (that’s a big sacrifice for God, we know how much he likes sacrifices), or even if they return to the path. Jeremiah points out that there are a lot of prophets out there saying that God is loving and forgiving and if the Jews repent and return to the path, all will be good. God says he didn’t send those prophets and he’s not doing that. He wants Jeremiah to spread doom and gloom.
- God swears that even if Moses and Samuel came back and counseled him to forgive, he wouldn’t. And he lays the zero point at the feet of King Manasseh, who he says was the last straw and the point where everything went downhill. I had to go back and refresh my memory. (II Kings 22)- Manasseh was the 12 year old kid who became king, stuck around for 55 years, rebuilt pagan altars, restored human sacrifice (including his own son), and went about killing random citizens for sport. Basically, Joffrey Baratheon if he’d have lived longer.
- God says I told you not to intermarry with the gentiles. In fact, don’t mix with them, don’t party with them, don’t mourn with them, don’t break bread with them. You will die. You will be wiped from the face of the earth. You will be lost. While phrased as an individual admonition, it’s clear that God is talking to Jeremiah about Jews not assimilating into the surrounding gentile cultures, in any way, shape, or form, as this will lead to losing their way, and their disappearance, as a people.
- For all his bluster over the last sixteen pages, God seems to have gotten most of it out of his system. There’s some hope, perhaps. He tells Jeremiah to go to the city gates and exhort the people to remember and observe the Sabbath. Perhaps, he opines, he will see some glimmer of hope, judging the people one by one. And those who choose to observe the Sabbath may become the community leaders and the rulers over Jerusalem, and in turn, the world.
- As Jeremiah objects to the whole “destroy all humanity, start over again”, God sends him to watch a potter at work. As the potter works his clay, when it doesn’t shape the way he wants, he smashes it down and starts over again. God asks, “why can’t I do the same?”
- Still at the potter’s, God tells Jeremiah to take one of the wine jugs, fill it with wine, and go to the city gates. There he’s to announce to one and all that while he loves his sacrifices, he wants cows and sheep, not children. Then Jeremiah is to smash the jug of wine to the ground and tell the people that that’s what God is going to do to them. Smash their cities, and turn them all into cannibals and zombies. I guess that glimmer of forgiveness has faded.
- One Pashhur, the local chief priest, isn’t happy with Jeremiah’s prophecies, and has him locked up overnight. Released the next day, Jeremiah unloads a diatribe on Pashhur about how he’s going to be one of the first against the wall when God shows up. Take that MF!
- The king of Judah isn’t happy that they’re being attacked by the king of Babylon, and he sends Pashhur (from the previous page) to ask Jeremiah exactly why this is happening. Jeremiah is like, “dude, this is what I’ve been prophesying for months, years even. God’s given up on you and your wicked ways. He’s helping out Babylon to destroy Judah. I told you all of this. Over and over and over again.”
- God tells Jeremiah to pass on to the king of Judah to, well, “make it right”. Take care of your people, especially the poor and downtrodden, handle your crime problems, your greed and fraud problems, and generally, stop being a putz, a schmuck. Get your act together! Then maybe, just maybe, God won’t help the Babylonians destroy you.
- God goes into a diatribe against the false prophets who claim to speak in his name. Not the ones who represent other gods, but the ones who claim to speak for him. At the time, he says, Jeremiah is the only one with a direct line, authorized to speak on his behalf. There’s also a little gem throw-off line. He muses that while he still plans to destroy his chosen people who have gone astray in Israel and Judah, he plans to bring back the faithful from the diaspora, and set them up as the new chosen rulers of the land. Modern implications!
- God offers up a metaphor with baskets of good and bad figs. The good ones, he asserts to Jeremiah, are like the faithful in the diaspora, and will be brought back… to eat? The bad are inedible, like the faithless folk who stayed behind… and won’t be eaten? Lost in all this seems to be whether there are good, faithful people who stayed in Judah and Israel, and/or bad, faithless people who are outside the country. God is being very binary.
- God tells Jeremiah to remind the people (again) that he’s told them not to worship other gods and to be good people and they’ve ignored him, so he’s sending the Babylonians to conquer them and enslave them for seventy years. No mention yet of what happens after that.
- A new king of Judah arises, Jehoiakim. God sends Jeremiah with the usual litany of warnings, repent, repent, or I’ll turn your kingdom into a living hell. The officials seize him and sentence him to death, he tells them he’s just repeating God’s word. Some relent, some don’t. The king sentences Jeremiah and another prophet saying the same thing to death. The other guy, Uriah, is killed, but Jeremiah escapes death when he’s spirited away by a man named Ahikam.
- God sends Jeremiah back to the king who sentenced him to death, to tell him to surrender himself and the country to the king of Babylon, and serve Babylon as a punishment for not repenting. We await the royal response….
- Reasserting his prophetic dominance, Jeremiah, while in chains, challenges the prophet Hananiah’s all-will-be-well prophecies, stating that the future, and God, will tell who’s right. Hananiah has Jeremiah released to go on his way, and then dies seven months later.
- Nebuchadnezzar has taken over, the Jews have been exiled to Babylon. Jeremiah sends a letter to all the elders and leaders detailing God’s instructions. Spend the next seventy years building your families, your wealth, and repairing your relationship with God. In seventy years, God will make an assessment as to whether you’ve shown appropriate contrition, and if so, restore everything to you and your family, including the lands of Israel and Judah, and help you destroy your surrounding enemies and neighbors. It’s the marshmallow test.
- God asks Jeremiah why the people are upset about being made slaves in Babylon? He’s made it clear that it’s only for seventy years. They’ll be restored to health and wealth and power after that. Jeremiah waffles on this one and doesn’t mention human lifespans.
- Once it’s time for the Jews to return to Israel and Judah, God will make sure that the land goes from desert to abundant farmland, he will help secure the borders and assist in the removal of all those who would oppress them. After all, Chosen People. If you ever wondered where the fervor and ideals of the ultra orthodox in Israel come from in expanding borders and pushing others out comes from, it is prophecies like this one.
- Just to emphasize his awareness of everything, God points out that while he’s doing this whole seventy years in the hands of Babylon (and Chaldea) thing to all the Jews in Israel and Judah, it’s the residents of Jerusalem who are most at fault. This changes nothing.
- Apparently Jeremiah’s back in prison, or maybe this is a flashback. God sends word to him (via??? is there some jailhouse message network at play?) that although he’s planning to destroy Israel and Judah (for 70 years) and then redeem them, what he could do… is simply wipe them clean of their sins, bring them back into favor, and all will be well and good. I presume we’re headed towards some sort of “free will” conversation with our beleaguered prophet.
- “Look,” says God, “you guys were once slaves, you know what it’s like, stop it. Just stop it.” A bunch of folk agree to release their slaves, but then surreptitiously reacquire them. God is not amused. This is part of why he wants to destroy Jerusalem at the time.
- God sends Jeremiah to check out the tribe of the Rechabites. Long ago – have we heard of them previously??? – they were commanded by God to remain unfettered to a place, build no permanent structures, not till the land, and to never drink alcohol. Jeremiah finds they’ve remained faithful to their promise, and God promises they will live on, peacefully. God tells him to use them as an example to the people of Jerusalem, who, I’m sure, are really impressed with a bunch of landless nomads.
- God tells Jeremiah to write down a list of all the terrible punishments he plans to inflict upon the wicked folk of Judah and Jerusalem and then go read it to them. Jeremiah calls in his scribe, Baruch, to write the scroll, and then notes that he’s in hiding. He sends Baruch to read the scroll in the market square. Baruch is taken to the city elders and reads it to them. They take him to the king’s advisors and he reads it to them. They take the scroll from him and advise him to hide with Jeremiah, because the king won’t be happy. The king destroys the scroll. Jeremiah has Baruch write another one and get it to the advisors. Rinse and repeat four times, the king angrier and angrier. God says destroying the king’s lineage is now his first priority.
- Being a prophet isn’t the easiest life. I could just stop there. But, where are we in the story? God sends Jeremiah to deliver prophecies to the king of Judah, but via the round-about method of trying to leave the city and head towards the enemy camps. This gets him arrested for trying to defect. He is imprisoned in the basement of a local scribe’s house for a long period. The king sends for him and asks what it’s all about. He shares the prophecies, the king isn’t pleased. Jeremiah asks to be moved to a better prison. The king says, sure, but you’re still going back to prison, but sends him to a minimum security facility with the guarantee of one loaf of bread per day to eat. How generous.
- From his prison cell Jeremiah continues to advise the people what God has told him – simply surrender to the attackers and they will be spared, 70 years of servitude, then restoration, blah, blah, blah. So the king has him put down a well, with no food. He continues to prophesize. The king has Jeremiah brought to him for a private conversation. Jeremiah says, look, if I say stuff you don’t like, you’ll put me back in prison or kill me, and you won’t listen to what God says anyway. The king says, no, no, tell me. Jeremiah repeats it all, the king sends him back to prison, where, we are given a preview, he remains until Jerusalem falls.
- Everything Jeremiah prophesized comes to pass. The Babylonians attack, capture Jerusalem, capture the king of Judah, kill his family and his ministers in front of him, take out his eyes, and leave him chained up in prison. The rich are taken prisoner. The poor are left alone. The walls of the city and the Temple are destroyed. Jeremiah is brought before the king of Babylon and given his freedom to live among the people. The seventy years of servitude commences. It’s not clear if the Babylonians understand this is time-limited.
- Prison chief escorts Jeremiah out, and tells him that this is all his fault, for prophesizing that Jerusalem and Judah would be destroyed and the people put in servitude, and he hopes he’s happy, and get out of here. Jeremiah joins a group of other refugees from Judah under the leadership of Gedaliah, son of…etc., who assures them all that servitude to Babylon won’t be so bad. More and more refugees arrive to join. There is unrest….
- Not everyone is happy with Gedaliah as the leader of the remaining Jews. That includes Ishmael, son of one of the nobles, who gathers a group of men and assassinates Gedaliah and his closet advisors. This is considered by many to be the defining moment of the end of Jewish autonomy in Israel, the culmination of the Babylonian invasion, and, in essence, self-inflicted. And, post-Rosh Hashanah, we have a fast day commemorating Gedaliah’s death.
- The remaining leaders of the Jews come to Jeremiah, hats (yarmulkes?) in hand, and ask, “What does God say we should do?” Jeremiah prays on this, and God gets back to him in ten days. He’s gotta think about it, ya know? Cuz he’s not 100% on whether he overreacted. Jeremiah tells the leaders that God says that if they stay in Babylonia and live in servitude as he threatened, they’ll be fine, he’ll make sure that life isn’t bad and the king shows mercy. But if they try to leave and head to, say, Egypt, he’ll make sure they’re destroyed.
- Not surprising. The leaders, particularly the military ones, aren’t about to sit around for seventy years in servitude, accuse Jeremiah of making up God’s response, and gather their followers and head for Egypt. God tells Jeremiah to head there too. When he arrives, with the Judean military leaders looking on, God tells him to mount some stones outside the Pharaoh’s palace, and let them know that he’s sending the king of Babylon there to crush the Egyptians and the Judeans who went to live and fight along side them.
- God says (through Jeremiah), look, I gave you all multiple chances. I told you again and again to stop idolatrous practices and worshiping other gods, and you refused. I’ve had enough, you’re all dead to me. And soon, just plain dead, too. The leaders protest, claiming they followed all the things that God demanded of them, and nothing ever got better. Jeremiah reminds them that they tried to have it both ways, both following God, but also other gods, in particular Egypt’s Queen of Heaven. Hedging bets is a no go!
- “I’m tired. I’m sick and tired of prophesizing bad news. I’m sick and tired of being God’s mouthpiece.” “Jeremiah, STFU and get back to work, I have more things for you to tell them.”
- Basically, today’s portion is a bard song about the coming war between Egypt and Babylonia, with paeans to the bravery of the soldiers on both sides, but a clear statement that God is going to make sure the Egyptians lose.
- Seemingly relevant given the news these days, God swears to crush, annihilate, and be mean to the Philistines in Gaza, wiping them off the face of the Earth, leaving no descendants.
- This appears to be setting up for a litany of the doom approaching for various surrounding kingdoms. Today God pronounces his curses on Moab, what is now the mountainous area in southern Jordan. Apparently the Moabites are a bunch of self-righteous snobs who he’s going to send fleeing for their lives before chasing them down and ending them.
- Ditto yesterday, God’s targets today are the Ammonites – who lived east of the Jordan River, in another part of what is present day Jordan; and the Edomites, from the southeast of Israel, who were the direct lineage descendants of Esau, the disinherited son of Isaac, after the whole debacle with Jacob claiming his birthright; and, finally, the folk from Damascus, in present day Syria.
- Jeez, this just feels like it’s going on and on. This is one long book. Even among the original five books of the Tanakh only Genesis makes it to fifty chapters. Today we have the litany of grievances against the Chaldeans, the people of Merathaim, Pekod, and… Babylon. Isn’t Babylon where God sent the Jews to live in servitude for seventy years? Now he’s going to destroy the Babylonians too. God is nothing if not capricious in his destructive bent.
- I am guessing I just missed something, or perhaps it was just assumed that readers would get the time jump. We seem to be at the end of the 70 years of servitude in Babylon, and God is basically saying, “okay Babylonians, you played your part in my drama to get the Jews back in line, but really, you’re as bad or worse, so now they, and I, are going to destroy you.”
- I am completely nonplussed here. Suddenly, we’re back before the Babylonian invasion, discussing the youthful king Zedekiah who was the last straw for God leading to this entire book. Is this just a reminder of where it all started? Basically a recap – bad king, prophecies of doom, Babylon invades, Jews in servitude. There is an interesting description of a decorative meshwork of 100 pomegranates around the castle. The book (finally) ends here.
Next Book, Ezekiel